A Transylvanian mail-order bride finds herself stranded thousands of miles from home with no husband, no money and no hope.

Svetlana Flamingo is no quitter as you will see as she attempts to carve out a new career on the streets of Belfast as she transforms herself into a showgirl destined for greatness (or at least a walk on part in The Bill).

Kitsch, glam and exotica collide with desperate spinster to produce a tour de force which sees contortion, dance, clown and possibly even alligator wrestling combine in Svetlana's attempt force the hand of destiny!